I am a haunted woman, by none other than me, myself, and the 130+ pounds of flesh that I melted away.
I take small comfort in her existing as a spirit outside my current body, because, honestly, where does 130 pounds go? They say we breathe out the melted fat, as an exhalation over time… maybe I breathed her a new home. The old Katie, like a feral beast, living out her rebel days amongst the flora and fauna in cold landscapes where she will never sweat. She is at peace in her green cocoon of quiet. Nobody calls her fat. Nobody gives her pep talks. Nobody underestimates her. Nobody tells her she isn’t good enough. But sometimes she slinks back in anger to eat my scraps of self-doubt, pain, and backstory. I owe her an apology. She didn’t deserve how I and others treated her.Read More